Phyllis Diller Quotes

Phyllis Diller Quotes: My own laugh is the real thing and I've had it all my life.
Send Quote
Phyllis Diller Quote: My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked.
Send Quote
Quotes about Phyllis Diller: I will never give up. I am in my 14th year of a 10-day beauty plan.
Send Quote
Quote about Phyllis Diller: The constants all through the centuries will be the same; wine, women and song. Other than that, life will be very different technologically. In the year 3000 the universe will be expanding as it will forever, infinitely. We will probe outer space but never find life as evolutionized as ours. We were not created by a deity. We created the deity in OUR image. Life began on this planet when the first amoeba split. Mankind will still be seeking God, not accepting that God is a spirit; can't see it, touch it, only feel it. It's called LOVE.
Send Quote
Phyllis Diller Sayings: The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing at you.
Send Quote
Phyllis Diller Saying: Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.
Send Quote
Sayings about Phyllis Diller: There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto.
Send Quote
Saying about Phyllis Diller: When you hire a person to plan your wedding, this does not include securing the groom. Plan to get married on Friday the 13th. In years to come this will make it much easier to explain why things turned out badly. To look beautiful at your wedding, take time to plan it. It took me a long time to find two ugly bridesmaids and a frumpy little flower girl.
Send Quote
Phyllis Diller Quotes: If your husband wants to lick the beaters on the mixer, shut them off before you give them to him.
Send Quote
Phyllis Diller Quote: Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.
Send Quote
Quotes about Phyllis Diller: Life began on this planet when the first amoeba split. Mankind will still be seeking God, not accepting that God is a spirit; can't see it, touch it, only feel it. It's called LOVE.
Send Quote
Quote about Phyllis Diller: Remember there is no way you can give the father custody of the children without getting a divorce.
Send Quote
Phyllis Diller Sayings: If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door greet him with, 'Who could have done this? We have no enemies!'
Send Quote
Phyllis Diller Saying: Your husband is lazy if when he leaves the house, he finds out which way the wind is blowing and goes that direction.
Send Quote
Sayings about Phyllis Diller: Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood.
Send Quote
Saying about Phyllis Diller: For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move.
Send Quote
Phyllis Diller Quotes: Once my husband said to me, 'I'm going to have some coffee. Do you want me to put some hot water on for you?' I thought that was the least he could do considering I was giving birth.
Send Quote