Jay Leno Quotes

Jay Leno Quotes: The leaders of the Taliban said today that killing bin Laden won't solve the problem. But, you know, it couldn't hurt.
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Jay Leno Quote: If any job should give you a company car, it's the car bomb business.
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Quotes about Jay Leno: Yesterday Gary Condit spent the whole day attending an agricultural meeting. Boy, that's when you know a congressman's in real trouble: when he spends the whole day actually working.
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Quote about Jay Leno: So, Wesley Clark is running for president. Pretty amazing guy. Four star general, first in his class at West Point, supreme commander of NATO, saw combat in Vietnam, won the bronze star, silver star, the purple heart for being wounded in battle. See, I'm no political expert, but that sounds pretty good next to choking on a pretzel, falling off a scooter and dropping the dog.
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Jay Leno Sayings: There are 249 millionaires in Congress. Remember a couple of years ago when this new Congress told us they had the solution to the recession? Apparently, they didn't share it with the rest of us.
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Jay Leno Saying: The White House begun airing their TV commercials to re-elect the president, and the John Kerry campaign is condemning his use of 9/11 in the ads. He said, it is unconscionable to use the tragic memory of a war in order to get elected, unless of course, it's the Vietnam War.
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Sayings about Jay Leno: Kerry was here in Los Angeles. He was courting the Spanish vote by speaking Spanish. And he showed people he could be boring in two languages.
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Saying about Jay Leno: There is a video out now on how to please men. Here's tip number 1: Just show up!
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Jay Leno Quotes: Statistics show 50% of the people use the internet. The rest have sex with real people.
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Jay Leno Quote: George W. Bush says he spends sixty to ninety minutes a day working out. He says he works out because it clears his mind. Sometimes just a little too much.
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Quotes about Jay Leno: According to a survey in this week's Time magazine, 85% of Americans think global warming is happening. The other 15% work for the White House.
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Quote about Jay Leno: These White House scandals are not going away anytime soon. People in Kenya are now saying he's 100 percent American. That's how bad it's gotten.
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Jay Leno Sayings: As you may have heard, the U.S. is putting together a constitution for Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours? Think about it - it was written by very smart people, it's served us well for over two hundred years, and besides, we're not using it anymore.
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Jay Leno Saying: President Obama gave a big speech on climate change. He believes global warming is getting worse because apparently he's sweating a lot more during his second term
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Sayings about Jay Leno: Family planning experts are now recommending giving men vasectomy gift cards for the holidays. Talk about taking the jingle out of the bells.
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Saying about Jay Leno: In the spirit of the Olympic Games, they traditionally ask that all fighting and warfare around the world stop. So, there's hope for a ceasefire within the Jackson family.
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Jay Leno Quotes: John Kerry says that he wants to debate President Bush once a month until the election. This could be a risky move for Senator Kerry. If Bush doesn't show up for the debates, John Kerry may end up debating an empty chair. And that could be pretty much a toss up as to which one has the better personality.
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Jay Leno Quote: Astronomers have discovered a planet that is twice the size of earth and made of diamonds. President Obama says the planet may be inhabited by aliens not paying their fair share.
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